Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Marriage: A Beautiful Mess

This was us before we got married. Look at me trying to be cool.

This week my wife Kelli and I are celebrating our 6 year anniversary! We have been together now for 8 years. I think marriage is beautiful because here we see the mysterious union of two becoming one. I think marriage is messy because here we see two sinners trying to be one. Not easy. This is why marriage requires divine grace. Two sinners cannot become one without God’s power and goodness. Apart from him we are too prideful and too self-centered.

Where would I be without Jesus? I cannot imagine being a good father and a good husband apart from Christ. Not that I am perfect, but I am certainly better than I would be. I feel blessed to be married for two reasons: God is in the center of our relationship and I have Kelli as my partner.

I am very aware that God has blessed me with a unique woman for a wife. She is sweet, compassionate, and strong. Most people (including her) would not perceive Kelli as “strong.” In our culture we think of “strong” in terms of outgoing, outspoken, and controlling. Kelli is none of these things. She is a shy introvert who would rather jump out of a window then speak in front of a large crowd.

Yet, she has what the Bible calls quiet strength. She is faithful, selfless, and available. She confirmed our decision to move to Kentucky so I could attend Asbury Seminary. She was vocal about our need to sponsor a child through World Vision even though I was in graduate school and we barely had enough to get by. Eating out for us was getting dollar burgers and sharing one drink because we could get free refills (I’m still not sure if that was ethical). She is the one who loves youth ministry just as much as I do. She is always willing to open our house for a youth who needs a place to stay. And she was the one who said “Let’s do it!” when we discussed adoption. Let’s face it; most women would not want the life we have. Most women want new cars, jewelry, amazing vacations…not youth trips and adoptions. I am so grateful God blessed me with such an amazing wife.

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes we are a mess…just like any other couple. But our marriage is a beautiful mess and I love our life together.